Do I give it time or not?

I wanted to write a bit of an update. 

PMrR1 and I have been exchanging emails.  We are communicating.  We have differences in perceptions it seems but at the very least we have openly communicated about them.

We have agreed to not communicate for the next month or so and give it time.  Then perhaps spend some time together as friends.

Did you notice I wrote 'friends'.  I'm perceiving fear in PMrR1 but I may be wrong.  For now, if I want him in my life, I will have to not only give it time (lots of time) but not cross the 'friend' line for the time being.

Thing is, we have not crossed that 'friend' line in my eyes but he seems to think that we are.  He is not clear as to why he feels that and frankly, nor am I.

We both agree that we have an extraordinary connection.  He wants to maintain a 'friendship' in the future.  I'm not so sure I'll be able to leave it at 'friends' only so what will be the point?  Honestly, I don't think that he will be able to leave it at 'friends' only either.  I truly don't.....this is why I think he is scared.

I have been single for much longer than PMrR1, perhaps that is playing on both our minds.  He still has a few things that need to be settled on a personal level.

For now, I obviously don't have a choice but to let this be and to take it as it comes.  As of today, June 2nd, I don't know if I will want to see him again at the end of the month.  I really don't.  In fact, he says he does right now, but I'm not so sure he will want to see me at the end of the month either.

I also have to decide if I will get back to dating others.  I don't want to.  I truly deep down don't want to.  I'm tired and don't feel like I have the energy to do so.  Part of me feels like I should though.  That it will be emotionally safer for me to go out with others. 

You all know that I don't want just a friendship, but I don't know if it will ever escalate to more with PMrR1.  I don't know if I should wait around to see or just throw it away and start fresh in awhile. 

I know that the connection that we have is the basis for a great relationship but if a relationship is not wanted or perceived by the other person, what is the point?  Will he ever allow himself to push through that fear?  Do I wait and see?  Will I be wasting my time if I do that? 

At this moment, as I'm writing this, I think I will give it the month of June and see.  Thing is, in a few minutes, I may be thinking that it's better to get back online and to find someone else to date so that I detach from this PMrR1 thing.

I don't know what to do.....

Signed, a sitting in limbo SSW :(

This depicts the reason we won't be able to have a friendship only relationship....even if we try.